TGTSG
Teen's Guide To Social Groups
Questions an Emerging Adult Might Have:
1) Why do cliques form?
At a very young age, humans begin to reject or accept other people. As we get older, we begin to form cliques because people have an innate instinct to create a group with other people, usually based on similar traits.
2) What are the pros and cons of being in a clique?
3) How do I know I am in an unhealthy clique?
Ask yourself these questions:
- Do I feel comfortable in my own group?
- Am I with them just so that I don’t feel alone?
- Do they treat me right?
- Is my input important to them or is it pushed aside?
- Do I want to be controlled by one person or I want us all to share our ideas?
- Do I feel right doing things I know I should not do?
4) What should I do if I am in an unhealthy clique?
Regarding the previous questions, if you believe that you are in an unhealthy clique, there is always a way to get out. When in a clique, you should be yourself, feeling carefree, knowing that your friends are there to be your support system and not a panel of judges. It is okay to be afraid about being alone, but that is not as bad as how you would feel if you did something against your will or conscience. Travel from clique to clique. Find a hobby, sport or join a club that suits you. There are many people who are accepting and would not mind making a new friend.
5) How do I deal with cliques who harass me?
If a clique is harassing you, here are a few tips:
- Stay calm and ignore that group. Working yourself up will only hurt you.
- If in a clique, express your concern to your group; they are there to help you. If not in a clique, do not be afraid to seek help from a grown up. Teachers and counselors are available to you to make school a safe environment.
- If everything else fails, make your voice be heard. You are not alone. Someone out there is going through the same thing or has been down that road. Create awareness that bullies are there and your voice is as important as theirs.
Pros Both Cons
- Awareness of social norms (ex. Clothes and Music fads).
- Being able to feel comfortable among friends.
- Finding your own identity
- Gain in confidence knowing you belong to a group.
- Knowing your group will be behind you when a situation arises.
- Attitudes. When in a healthy clique, attitudes can be more caring, patient and attentive. When in an unhealthy clique, one can be aggressive, disrespectful and unresponsive.
- Grades. Can improve when in a healthy clique but can fall when in an unhealthy clique.
- Being peer pressured into doing things just to stay in the group.
-Feeling excluded from group activities.
- Feeling like you do not have your own identity.
- Getting attached to other people to the point of being afraid to be alone.